The Catholic church's views on mastupration and other expressions of sexual desire lead to the following conundrum: the ordinary Catholic should marry and have sex, but they should not want to marry and have sex. They have, however, an easy solution which allows them to find an appropriately undesirable mate: marrying a Catholic.
In this simple solution, some might see the elegance of God's hand directing matters, and suggest that they have found a reason for why this Church - which claims to have killed the Cathars and declared Crusades - is to be sanctified and is not on any count to be abandoned.
God might love us all, but why do Christians speak as if they know exactly how God feels? It is because the Christian constructs God, only for God - with the help of his priests - to dismantle the Christian.
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